Last week one of my friends got on Facebook Messenger and sent the word out that she needed a girls night.
She’d been playing mommy pretty intensely for the past few months and just needed time away from home and children to remember just who she used to be.
The rest of the gang chirped back that they were all in need of some face time and wouldn’t Saturday night be a great time to get it done? We proceeded to throw ideas around for what we’d like to do, like dinner and a movie, when I suggested we all just get together at my house for a cheap night and chat therapy.
I’ll provide the house, I said, and you guys just bring whatever you want to eat, drink and do. And thus, girls night came to be.
The girls got pretty excited about it and when one of them posted a GIF of little girls having a pajama party, it was decided we’d also have a pajama party. This was made even funnier when a coworker asked if I was doing anything fun for the upcoming weekend. The look on his face said it all, so let me explain a bit for the guys out there.
If you are imagining a bunch of women in Victoria’s Secret attire giggling and playfully throwing pillows at each other, be assured that the only place that happens is inside your head. I have never been to a pajama party like that in over five decades, and it’s unlikely to start happening now.
Women just want to be comfortable and relax. The girls showed up in their p.j.’s, which generally consisted of fleece or flannel pajama pants and soft, stretchy long-sleeved Henley tops. Each one arrived with a bottle or two of wine, several movies and perhaps a munchie to share. No pillows were involved whatsoever.
We moved to the kitchen and never left. Well, Ms. A left. We decided what we would need from the store and she volunteered to go get it for us. And yes, she did this in her pajamas. And she did a helluva job, too. She brought back wonderful things like several frozen pizzas, ingredients for taco dip, several kinds of chips, two kinds of ice cream, and the pièce de résistance… Philadelphia brand cheesecake filling in a tub.
All the ladies oohed and ahhed when they saw that, as she had brought it to the last gathering and we all enjoyed it immensely. We didn’t even bother with graham crackers, we just ate it out of the tub with large spoons. Heaven!
We brought chairs into the kitchen, but took turns sitting on the floor as the night went on, complaining about work and crappy bosses and obnoxious customers and the trials and tribulations of raising a family. We also told funny stories and laughed so hard our tummies hurt. We enjoyed all the food but never got around to watching any movies.
We listened to each others complaints and concerns and offered advice and approval where necessary. It’s so nice to get another perspective on such things, and stuff that had been bothering me and weighing on my mind didn’t seem quite so daunting after tossing it around with my homies.
Before we knew it, four hours had passed and we were still going strong. We laughed at the fact that we were still in the kitchen, yakking away and had no plans to alter that.
We all became friends through community theater, learning lines and dance steps together, dressing up as characters and being silly for a very appreciative audience. We’ve seen each other at our best and our worst, and shared years of ups and downs together, offering encouragement, help and support as needed.
Many years ago I discovered a quote that states it very eloquently. “A friend hears the song in my heart and sings it to me when memory fails.” And that’s exactly what good friends do. They know who we really are, and remind us of that and bring us back to center when we’ve forgotten how to get there.
And that’s why girls night is wonderful and necessary, and something that should really happen much more often, and on a regular basis. Maybe next time we’ll even get out of the kitchen and watch a few movies. One thing’s for sure though… there will be a fresh tub of cheesecake filling!